The Four Agreements - 4th Agreement: Always do your best

The last and final agreement in Don Miguel Ruiz’s The Four Agreements is to always do your best. Doing your best is different for everyone and depends on the circumstances. Nevertheless, it can shift how you view and judge yourself and others and release us from unnecessary disappointment.

For childbearing women, always remembering to do your best can be met with a lot of frustration because you often feel that your best is not enough. When your responsibilities include caring for yourself and growing baby, the home, tending to your partner, and especially if you have a career (a whole set of other commitments), it can be overwhelming, leading to overextending yourself. If you’re exceeding daily tasks, it is challenging to do your best because you operate from a place of exhaustion. If you remember that you may desire perfection, but it is unrealistic, you can live happier and guilt-free.

Always doing your best because that’s what we should be doing instead of for a reward can help liberate individuals from the feeling of obligation or duty, allowing them to focus on the task at hand with greater awareness and intention. When we are not attached to the outcome, we are more likely to give our best effort and be present in the moment. This can lead to improved performance and greater satisfaction, even if the results are not what we had hoped. In short, by always doing our best without the expectation of reward, we can open ourselves up to a more enriching and satisfying life experience. There’s no blueprint for pregnancy, as it is different for everyone. What works for some may not work for others, and that is okay. It is all a learning experience and meant to help you grow as a person. There are ebbs and flows in life. One week you may feel like you have enough energy to walk for 30 minutes every day, and the following week you may only be able to walk 30 minutes 1 day out of the week. Remembering that you are doing your best will diminish feelings of defeat.

Another point to consider, if our mindset is focused on doing something because of how we’ll be acknowledged when we do, it alters how we show up in the world. This returns us to the other agreement of not taking things personally. For instance, you do something for someone, and the gratitude you expected is not the outcome; you take this personally because you’re doing something that you think will get you what you want, and you shouldn’t operate from that space. It’s unnecessary to do things out of obligation and for praise. Do it for you!

Don Miguel Ruiz states in this agreement that three things are the impact of doing our best:

⦁ We’re more productive.

⦁ We have less negative self-talk about ourselves or about others.

⦁ Leaves room for more gratitude.

The agreement to always do your best is the foundation for all three other agreements. In keeping these agreements in mind with everything you do, it is best to remember that you’re not perfect and won’t always adhere to these principles but trying is enough. Also, remember that bringing life into this world is one of the greatest gifts you should be proud of your journey.

Use these agreements to return to as your code of ethics when you feel like you’re not being the best version of yourself and show up as who you are meant to be. I hope you’ve enjoyed this read and use the agreements to your benefit!